8/07/2017

I’ve been home for less than 24 hours so all the emotions and memories are one big mess right now. I have not had time to systematise them. So this is a random collection of my thoughts in an order just as random.

I have been to two other youth congresses before and the realisation that this one was very different took me by surprise. The difference was not due to different speakers or location or worship styles, it was the fact that I was working there that made all the difference in the world. During the first days I hardly participated in any of the activities (except for the worship services). I had only my talk and my workshops on my mind. When others took part in all the fun activities, I would spend time pacing in my hotel room practicing my talk or would spend some sweet hours at the hotel pool going over my workshop materials. Even the fact that we lived in a hotel a couple of hundred meters away from the congress venue made it all feel like I wasn’t really part of the congress life. And I was okay with it. I guess I’m getting used to work and to give at places to which others come to relax and receive – at camp meetings, worship services etc. So it actually took me by surprise that once I was done with my workshops and the stress level dropped, the congress emotion hit me hard. Suddenly I found myself sitting there in the big meeting hall on Friday night and on Saturday night service and crying my eyes out during the worship and the baptism service because everything was just so beautiful and emotional. Then I finally felt that I was part of the crowd of 4000 youth, part of the emotion, part of the uniting faith. It was beautiful.

It was a wonderful feeling to go to the hotel restaurant every morning and to see the most dedicated and talented group of people our church has here in Europe all around me. There is this special energy when a large group of wonderfully talented and dedicated people come together. Some of the sound technicians were up and running for 18 hours a day. One evening late I sat in the lobby with K. and P. who were putting together the program for the next evening, discussing thoroughly and seriously the order of songs. Every tiny detail needed to be thought through. I saw the band members lying on the stage floor during a pause in their practice. I saw the hosts practicing their lines backstage. I saw Newbold and Friedensau lecturers getting ready for their workshops. It was the most inspiring thing to see.

And then the talk. I am clearly not the most objective person to talk about it but from my biased and subjective viewpoint I can say that I did my best and I have no reason to feel ashamed. What I was the proudest of was the preparation, the constant practising. I really did know it by heart. And this was the only reason why I was able to speak without any notes and without going blank in front of the crowd. It was a pity I didn’t really see people – the lights were blinding so I only saw people who were sitting right in front of the stage. But maybe it was good, maybe it would have been too intimidating to see them, I don’t know. But I do know that I will watch my beloved TED Talks in a different way from now on. These presenters all look effortlessly cool and elegant and smart but the truth is there is a lot of sweating and hard work and even insecurity behind the facade. But these things make the success even sweeter.

I also learnt a simple equasion I didn’t know before: a modestly pink lipstick + blinding lights + cameras = raging neon pink. I will be wiser next time.

+37'C is a terrible temperature to endure.

And meeting my people! Oh, what a sweet sweet thing. For example, I was hanging out with Dr M. P. a lot. He’s one of those people who has amazing amount of life experience, I don't think I could ever get tired of listening to him. It was on Saturday morning that we happened to eat breakfast together and we got so carried away that once we realised, everyone else had left the hotel and we were late for the Sabbath morning service. But honestly, marriage, absurdity of life and Camus really needed to be discussed.

They were wonderful days, they really were. I’m richer, I’m more experienced, I’m refreshed. And I think I'm being taken more seriously. I couldn’t ask for more.

Q/A session after the talks.
The main speaker, pastor S. L. did a great job.
The place was massive.
We broke the world record for the biggest nail mosaic. 100 000 nails.

With Dr M. P. Some reunions are sweeter than others.
The talk.

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