I went to The Experience last night and fell into the deep pit of melancholy. I sat there in the middle of people I don't know anything about and who know nothing about me, and a part of me felt a need to shout out and to let them know that The Experience used to be my baby, that it was my ministry and my cross to carry and one of the brightest Newbold memories that is still very dear to my heart. And it's not only about me, there was someone else there yesterday who used to lead The Experience even longer than I did. How come these people don't know anything about it, was my initial thought. How come? Is there anything left of what we used to be and do? Or is it really all gone?

I went out and sat on a bench after the program had ended and looked up to the skies and asked these question all over again. I didn't get a revelation or anything, no burning letters across the starry sky, but there was still this quiet voice somewhere inside that told me, No, none of what you did, none of your passion and time you gave, none of it is gone. It may not be visible any longer, and the people whom you used to meet and who kept coming to The Experience week after week may be far away, but none of it is lost. And I was reminded again that in the heart of Jesus' Kingdom movement is something mystical, something that may seem as tiny as a mustard seed or as invisible as yeast, something that is very easy to miss and overlook, but something that at the same time is real and powerful and lasting, something that Jesus never ever ovelooks.

So it's fine. I don't need these kids to know what we used to do a year or two years ago, I just need to know there's someone who takes The Experience to be their burden and cross now, and who keeps kneading the dough with the Kingdom yeast as passionately as I did, as passionately as my friends did. And who may come visit Newbold in three years time when nobody knows them, sit at the back of the Student Centre, see new people leading The Experience, and have peace in their heart and smile on their face. Yes.