5/7

A couple of words about my experience with the Swedish parental leave system.

In a nutshell, Sweden is one of the best places in the world to have children. The maternity / paternity leave is long and flexible, and staying home for several years is a societal standard rather than an exception.

So, basically, you get 480 paid days of parental leave (some of these days need to be taken out by the father - so it's not just the mother who gets to stay home with the child). You can take these days out in one big block, or you can stretch and divide them up in all sorts of ways if you want to work or study part-time. The latest change in Swedish laws lets even grandparents take out paid parental leave days (isn't that cool?). But the coolest thing is that you can delay taking out these days altogether until the child's 1st birthday. 

This is exactly what we decided to do. So my 480 days started ticking on 10th of November when L. turned one. Before that, well, we just lived on S's salary and savings. I liked that "experiment" for several reasons. First, because it really makes my leave a long one! But secondly, we have proven to ourselves that living on one modest salary is doable, and it is not a rocket science! In this context, I am so grateful for S. who is very responsible with money. We had no major expenses last year - we didn't travel almost at all, the car didn't break down, our teeth didn't need fixing lol. So it was just the most simple everyday expenses we had to cover and we managed to do that very well. If ever we need to survive like this again, we know it is possible.

Now that my maternity leave is paid, it almost feels like I am swimming in money! We can even afford an occasional cafe date haha!

Before L. was born I watched hundreds of reels about having a baby. I went properly down the rabbit hole, and the social media algorithms kept feeding me those videos. One of the topics that popped up all the time was breastfeeding and pumping and storing milk etc. For many women pumping is their reality and there were a lot of tips given how to do this and how to increase the milk supply and how to store milk properly. It was months after L. was born that it suddenly hit me - all these reels come from America, from a country where a lot of women go back to work two weeks after delivery. And if this is your reality, you really do need to know everything about pumping and storing milk. Uhh! Here in Scandinavia, it is hard to fathom such a life, a life where the government doesn't offer you any safety nets. Here you can just stay home. I do count my blessings.

We are trying to use every trick available in order to lengthen my maternity leave. If at all possible, I would like to be home until L. turns three. It is such a precious time for me - except for some very early and grumpy mornings I enjoy this phase in my life immensely!