There are different kinds of dreams. In some cases you have a goal, a vision, and a way of getting there. You dream of becoming an elementary school teacher or a vet, and you know which uni you should go to and which course you should enrol in. There are steps you can take. But then there are the other kinds of dreams which seem so outlandish and unattainable that you have no idea how to make them come true. Or even if they could possibly come true.
For a good number of years I had a dream that belonged to that second category. As a homiletician, I dreamed of an opportunity to preach at the European Pastors Council one day. That was the peak of Everest for me.
Why?
I suppose there are several reasons for it. The main one has to do with the fact that my first EPC was a ground-breaking and mind-blowing experience. It was in 2007 when the EPC took place in the Netherlands. I had just started my MA studies in linguistics, and the thought of studying theology hadn't even crossed my mind yet. I was happy doing what I was doing. But then I spent five days in a translator's booth, and was absolutely shocked by the quality of sermons - I had never heard such powerful preaching before. The best preachers from Europe and the US seemed to be there! After the event, they published a collection of DVDs with the worship services, and I watched the sermons over and over again, mesmerised. Preaching suddely became an art - an art where intellectual and theological and emotional parts could come together in perfect harmony. I think this is why EPC has had a special place in my heart ever since.
But how do you get there? How does one make The List? How does it happen that in some planning committee meeting your name is mentioned (and another name, just as worthy, isn't)? There was no way for me to climb that Everest by myself. It was an unattainable dream.
But the dream came true regardless. Someone mentioned my name; someone made the decision; someone thought it was worth the risk...
So I preached my sermon last Wednesday. It was beautiful and emotional and tough, I felt the weight of the privilege and responsibility, and I was in awe of the miracle God has done in my life since that week in 2007 when I sat in the interpreter's booth at EPC, amazed.
The positive feedback has been overwhelming. The best feedback was, of course, the utter silence in the meeting hall. That moment when you realise that no phones are glowing, no-one is fidgeting or coughing, and that the Spirit is breathing life into your words and making them come alive for the listeners...
But just as I was grateful for this opportunity, I was equally happy for other plenary speakers. It was so special for me to see J. and M. take the stage - they were the older, more experienced students in Newbold who got preaching invites from all over London and went about with a certain degree of confidence, and yet they had the grace to notice and encourage a small and quiet white girl, sitting in the homiletics class, taking her first shaky steps. This is true especially of J. - I actually don't think I would be where I am today without his constant encouragement and support. So it was a historical thing for me to share EPC's platform with him.
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| With M. and J. |
So, now I wonder. Where do I get a new dream from?
